搞笑英語話劇劇本-資料下載頁

　　

【正文】 Do we?（贏一個人需要理由么，不需要么，需要么？）李莫愁：Momma always said: “Life is like a box of chocolates, never know what you39。re gonna get.” I got it, Momma is 太子丹上（抱拳）：How are you? 荊柯：Fine, thank you, and you? 太子丹：Oh my God!Could you give me an innovative answer to “How are you”? 荊柯：Sure!太子丹：How are you? 荊柯：Fine, thank you, and your wife? 太子丹暈倒荊柯：Hey, man, I’m kidding!太子丹：Oh, I’m kidding too!（畢恭畢敬）May I have your name card, please? 荊軻從兜里掏出一卷紙，上面寫著： To be or not to be, that39。s a ：Hero，we need your ：I am busy now!太子丹：You can get a lot of ：I am very busy now!阿三：IC, ID, IQ card? 荊柯：I am very very busy now!阿三(手指上場的美女，激動狀): Look!She is the most beautiful girl in the you say ., she is （流口水）：I have to say she is a very sexy and beautiful girl, but TCM is my only love!阿三：What? What’s the TCM?荊柯。Hey, guy!You look so smart but why you didn’t know TCM? Any of them can give you the ：Excuse me? What’s the TCM? 觀眾甲：TCMTraditional Chinese ：I must show you the trump and gentlemen, this is Lipton Slimming is a brand new product of Unilever （激動）：Slimming減食療法 tea!I have dreamed of it for thousands of wife always threatens to leave me if I couldn’t reduce my ：You want? Speak up if you want!Why do you keep silent? Why are you looking at me? Although your eyes are full of sincerity, I’m very glad, you still have to speak it!Do you really like? Really?你不是真的想要吧？難道你真的想要嗎??荊柯(誠懇狀)Just tell me what should I do? I will do anything for （撞胯，擊掌）Yeah!Action Ш（《大話西游》主題曲響起）荊珂挽著妻子，太子丹,：Hero, we have already reached Yishui ：Just stop here, , my friends 太子丹：I will miss you, baby.（太子丹，阿三下。停頓。《泰坦尼克號》主題曲起，荊軻與妻子做Jack和rose在船頭的經典造型，忽然荊軻看到一個美女——此時一個中國古典美女經過，向荊軻拋媚眼，并拋下定情手絹。荊軻高興的盯著美女看，妻子發覺不對，扭過頭來。）荊珂（急忙收斂）：Darling, I love ：I love you!You mean more to me than anything in this whole world!（《肖申克的救贖》）荊珂(流淚)：I love you spite of you and me and the whole silly world going to pieces around us, I love you.(哪怕是世界末日我都會愛著你，選自《飄》)妻子： a man, just do it!I will be right here waiting for （欲走還留，執子之手又曰）：Sweetheart!You must do me this honor...promise me you will survive...that you will never give up...no matter what happens...no matter how hopeless...promise me now, and never let go of that promise（泰坦尼克號沉船時，Jack對Rose的傾訴）.妻子:“I promise.” 荊軻:“Never let go.“妻子:”I will never let go, 39。ll never let go.（荊軻的發音和jack很像，所以加了一些《泰坦尼克號》的臺詞。）妻子努力擠出幾滴眼淚，荊珂上船，漸漸遠去妻子：It’s a good day to e ?? Never?? 妻子(掏出手機撥號，阿三接手機)： Thank you very soon as I get the life assurance $1000, 000, I will transfer half of it, $500,000 to your ：Okay okay!旁白：Then Jingke was sent to Qin and finally killed by Yingzheng.第五篇：搞笑英語話劇劇本(修改版)搞笑英語話劇劇本《西門吹雪與葉孤城》搞笑5人劇本《西門吹雪與葉孤城》演員表：西門吹雪葉孤城花滿樓打更的太監旁白道具：牛奶兩袋，紙屑若干。第一幕：決戰鄉村陌路旁白：A quiet village is covered with white are dancing in the man is walking along the street, step by is ing in mysterious man ：The weather is dry and things are flammable, take care not catch the fire!I’m 打醬油的！Y與X相遇．X：Ohm, I’m sorry to knock you!Y: Haha, Never mind : Excuse me, Could you tell me your name?Y: ha ha, I won’t change my name!No matter what ’m the most famous——YeGucheng（登登登登！！）.Who are you?X: I’m (驚訝): Ar, ximenchuixue?X: Yes, what is wrong?Y: I heard that you are the best Martial Arts?X: Great, you know me!Y(抱腿)：Please, please…… Don’t kill me!Let me go!X: No, I must kill you!Y: I don’t want to be me go!X: No way!You know?Y(突然站起冷冷的說)：Don’t force me!X: Pardon!(Y拿出一袋牛奶)X(搶過牛奶):Milk, very good!I like drinking : Please drink it!X(喝完牛奶):Thanks, hahaY: Do you still want to kill me?X: Sure, must!Milk is (惱怒+冷酷):Very good!Very good!I hope you will not forget what you said!?X: I’m sure I won’t!Y: I must give you a lesson!If I don’t beat you this time, I’ll never be having properly!3210X(捂著肚子，蹲下)：Ouch, Ouch!Y(大笑)：Ha Ha……X(可憐狀): Help!Help!Where is the washroom?Y: What?X: Toliet?Y: What?X: The “WC”?Y: Oh, I see, go along this street and turn right when you see a crossing road!X: Thanks, (掏出紙屑吹):This is genuine snow!H: Stop!Protecting the environment is a basic obligation!Y: Who are you?H: Hua—man—lou!Have you seen ximenchuixue?Y: Yes, he was beaten by me and is in “WC” now, ha……H(驚訝):Now you are the best in the world!Y: You are right!H: Teriffic!You are the one I’m looking for!Do you want to join in me? Y: Yes, It’s very : Ok, follow me。let’s go!Y: Ok, Let’s go!(To be continued…)